Life and death decisions
Most of us want autonomy – to be able to make decisions based on our values, beliefs and preferences.
Counterbalance this with how difficult it is to think of one’s own demise, and we find that most of us don’t set out clearly how we want the last part of our lives to go. Making decisions about treatment and resuscitation while we are still able isn’t easy, but it’s very grown up!
My mother had a sticker on the window of her front door, and the same on the fridge, to guide paramedics and doctors to a Tupperware box in the fridge in which she had set out her wishes. Late in her eighties, and in much physical pain from arthritis, she didn’t want her life to be prolonged should she become life-threateningly ill. As her son, it was good to know what her wishes were so that I could make clear decisions based on hers should she become incapacitated. This was at least a gentler version than the woman who had DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) tattooed on her chest and PTO on her back!
An advance decision lets your family, carers and health professionals know your wishes about life-sustaining treatments if you’re unable to make or communicate those decisions yourself.
The treatments you’re deciding to refuse must all be named in the advance decision. Deciding to refuse a treatment is not the same as asking someone to end your life or help you end your life. A request for euthansia or assisted dying cannot be a part of this. These are illegal in England.
I took some ‘brave pills’ and set out my broad wishes. It does feel good to have done it.
You can find out more at https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/end-of-life-care/advance-decision-to-refuse-treatment/
